I have come to realize that when I allow people into my life, I become to dependent on their need of me. This slowing down has really brought this reality to the surface of my existence.
Being an essential worker and still working through the pandemic and more work being placed on my shoulders at work that has been seen as a reason to not need me in areas any longer. So in a sense the work I used to do was outsourced to another to complete in fear that my overwhelm at work wouldn’t be able to withstand critique.
When countless times in the past it was explicitly stated by me that that work wasn’t burdensome. So assumption has been on the scene that I couldn’t handle one more thing. I love how people think for me, but you better not even think of thinking for them.
At this point I need to evaluate who I have become dependent on and why I have done such, to then begin to work on building myself to where; as I am replaced it wont be so heart wrenching.
This life during this pandemic has not been all sugar and spice. There are times I question my faith and ask whats the point any more. Only to realize its only myself and dealing with humanity that brings on those pondering questions. God doesn’t change – people do! This last few months have been like the 8th circle of hell. To be perfectly honest, I am tired of fighting!
I have some changing myself to do at this point and learning how to keep fighting against all odds when folks tell you that your beyond help!
When you fall from Grace, look up to see who is standing over you saying “i told you so”…
I hope everyone is doing way better at this then I am..
These have been some of the best times and they have been some of the most stressful! Quarantine has brought most to a place of slowing down. It has for me too, with stores not being open and limitations on where you can and can’t go has made me sit down and do other things or venture out to find something new and different to partake in.
As of Friday, May 8th in the state in which I reside, the governor allowed for the stay at home order to be lifted to phase one reopen. Needless to say the weekend was mayhem. With Mothers Day on Sunday and some retail stores allowed to open at 50% capacity. Lines were long and they weren’t practicing social distancing and I do believe I have heard there has been a spike in the numbers since Phase One began.
On Friday when I got off work, I took a moment to stop and unwind a little in a secret Garden. Very quiet little spot to just be. It was very relaxing the time I did spend there. It made me too realize that If I don’t slow down from the stresses of life and work that life will inevitably will pass me by.
There are times I believe the Corona Virus Pandemic has brought a reset to the lives of many. Other times, I feel like we are one order away from Martial Law.
I have so enjoyed finding new spots to go for walks, the most recent one I found, others found too, so I haven’t gone back to that one in a while. I have though frequented the Town Common, they have large open spaces where people picnic and walk the boardwalk, fish, play with frisbee with friends or their pets.
Truthfully, it is so serene on the water and the nostalgia of having a picnic there one day are things memories are made from. Being that I am an ambivert, these times of seclusion to help me collect myself from the stress of work are prescriptions for the soul.
Recently, I went home to check on things. I can out of the house and at the back of the vehicle stood the huge majestic Doe. I was in awe at the power that radiated from her. I walked down to get my phone and captured her as she went on about her life. As, I watched her cross the greenway, I heard a scripture in my spirit.
“As the deer pants for the water brooks, So my soul pants for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God; When shall I come and appear before God?” Psalms 42:1-2 NASB
She reminded me that I need to make sure that I am close to the living water. I need to be planted there so that I can weather storms, flourish in season and out of season, bearing fruit at all times, of which; requires a constant connection to the living Word of God.
During these dark and unsure times it takes being anchored into something stable like the word of God to make it through each day. I don’t always come out stellar in some days, but I am learning a lot about myself, working on me to handle things better, changing and being aware of my triggers is a full time job to live a life reflective of God. I fail, fall down, struggle to get up, look at the dust to learn, brush it off and try again the next day.
Life is so uncertain now we have to make the best of what we have been given. This weekend news came that someone near where I work may have contract Corona Virus, I even recognized them as coming in to our place to pay on a bill. I fell down the rabbit hole of uncertainty so quick I sank like an anvil in quicksand.
I immediately thought and calculated the date of when I would be sick based on statistics, I even went as far as wondering did we contaminate an entire town, did I contaminate my Pastors when I visited them, my aging father, my boss, my coworker then who did all they interact with… I was so thankful to hear that the person didn’t have it. But the fear that has been instilled throughout all this really hit my front door fast. Thankfully that isn’t the case, that I am well and not infected by Corona Virus.
Thank you all for reading and supporting my blog! Comment below how this pandemic has touched your life!🌺
Shop my teespring store – I am working on a new pillow design its takin a while to upload it to the store! A new T-shirt is there. Prices are discounted!
Since my last time blogging about how this pandemic has touch my life so many things have changed in the world around me.
One Saturday afternoon after the governors orders had gone into effect, I ventured to go to the local Wal-Mart. That is a big store that had everything from clothing, food, medicines, vehicle maintenance to my readers not from America. So, I go to this Wal-Mart, mind you I am all gloved up, masked up, and having to walk around a barricade of sorts as the governor order stated stores had to have a flow so this creating one way in and one way out. But, to my surprise as I approached the door I had to wait to be allowed in. Never in all my years did I ever have to wait to go in Wal-Mart. Three people came out and three people were allowed in. They now have to keep up with the number of people inside the building to maintain safe social distancing.
I left the Wal-Mart to come home with my finds of essentials. So inwardly distraught by the way things are going that after I had settled in for the evening, I downloaded netflix free for 30days. I am not much of a tv watcher. But, with limitations on where I can go, what to do, I ventures down the rabbit hole of television programming. I work for a cable company and I get my fill of television woes from people that it is a turn off to watch tv, at least for me. I did find some interesting programming to fill my time in April. Binge watching full seasons was something I hadn’t partaken of til forced to stay home in a respect.
These are the tv shows and movies I filled my time with:
•Tiger King- An insane documentary on owners of big cats in America, murder,drugs, crazy ppl, and lions and tigers oh my indeed.
• Fuller House- A family oriented show of coming together after a tragedy and growing in a new way when faced with new living. I grew up on Full House this became a modern versin of same show.
•The Tudors – Henry VIII and his many wives and conquests to have a male heir.
•Frontier- A colonial based America during the time of fur traders in the North were battling it out for supremacy over one another.
•Self-Made the Madam CJ Walker Documentary- the fight and plight of African Americans in america to be seen as equals. To venture into her own business of hair grower and developing to a point of having her own factory. VERY INSPIRING STORY
• Queen Elizabeth movies (2) – The struggles of a female queen and the forcing of male dominance in a time that she showed the world that a woman can run her country just as well as any man.
• The Duchess – A movie of how women had no choice in their lives. The young lady from the Spencer family arranged to marry a DUKE In order to produce his heir to his title. He had a live in mistress to make him happy, but the Duchess was forbidden side love to make her happy. Even when she ran off to have it. She got pregnant by her lover. The Duke threatened to take her kids away. Hid her while pregnant and made her give the child to her lovers family.
While the movies or tv shows played I was sowing 4 masks, two for myself, two for a friend, and then I sowed two pillows to fill my time. My new pillows adorn my bed, my face masks are used when going out to stores and my friend has been using hers as she ventures out as well.
One day I got so bored with sowing and watching programs I had to get out. Yes I know scary, but I ventured to the Common and parked and took a secluded walk on the bridge. It was a mini escape from the city, corona-world, and a mental break from work and home. It was a brief adventure, but one I needed for some self-care.
I wanted to go back to the other spot for a walk, but so many had discovered it, that I was just too packed out for me to regain a since of peace and solace inwardly with all those people around. Not long ago, maybe even last weekend, not fully sure as days run together, but with the impending lift on some of the orders coming soon folks were out there having a cook out.
I drove by and was like really people. Its bad enough that Phase One reopening will last until the 22nd of the month of May. But the Governor has already said any drastic spike in corona cases we will stay at Phase One or fall back to shelter at home. This virus isn’t gone or dealt with in full and yet still people act as though this isn’t serious. People are dyeing, this is effecting homes, livelihoods and more.
Work has been so stressful, I am in telecommunication and we are essential. The business of providing cable or internet is taxing on the mind and more so when the owner has been prescribed seclusion for their health and safety. Channels cut out people freak out, the Monday before last we had a bad storm roll through with NorEasterly winds and rain, almost tornadic in nature that knocked our power out. Not good. Folks lost the four channels we run out of our office and the towns net was down. People were furious with us. But what caused it was beyond our control.
It was our fault that they lost programming, it was our fault thee internet was down. It was our fault that the power went out too I guess. This pandemic has taken folks to the edge. Im at work alone, power out and surging, its up to me to forcefully unplug technology or the many power surges would kill the computers and phones. Im finalky standing in the hallway where light from outside is coming in to watch customer after customer after customer fly down to the front of our building cause mind you our phones are web based and with power down they wont work.
To come fling open the door to be all accusatory of us cutting them off before they even realized, they were standing in a dark room with not one ounce of technology on. This happened countless times in that two hours the storm knocked our power out. It finally came back then I had to reset the office, get the four channels back up and get net restored, along with one of our program provisioners. That was not a fun Monday.
Now as Friday, May 8th at 5pm approaches and the Phase One Reopening begins no telling what stories may spawn from the next two weeks of that. All I know is I want a beach trip as an escape, even if its just for one day, I will take it!
Thank you to all who read and support my blog it means the world to me! I pray everyone is staying safe, healthy and happy as can be during these times!
I shared this image last week and I had to think about it. Had I really been doing nothing? Or were things changing in me?
I took this week to evaluate me and look at things I need to change about myself that have that come to the surface during the trials of life, especially during the hard reality times we live in now of a COVID-19 world. The fire of life, circumstances and mental and emotional rises, brought up a-lot with in me I must begin tackling.
Its going to be a journey of change, but I need to change what has been shown to me about myself.
“And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.” Matthew 7:3-5 KJV
I have been one to sit back and judge others when I myself have a huge timber in my own eye of how I am in my character and to be integral I need to sit down and deal with myself.
So much of life has happened around me that I sit and look that God has been using the pressure to get growth out of me.
Has it been easy?
Its been pure hell if I am to be blatantly honest. Knowing that your first nature wants to rise up, fight back, and oh believe me it has. To only realize on the other side of it, revealed wounds, wrong ways of thinking, wrong perceptions of which formed my misjudgment of a great many things.
I ultimately have a choice to make. Do I remain on the old path with my old ways and keep having dead-end/one sided relationships or do I choose the new road to a new way of conducting life in various trying circumstances in the changed manner that could nurture and grow relationships.
I choose the new path!
“I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:” Deuteronomy 30:19 KJV
Choosing this new road the beginning won’t be easy. But the long run of it all will be well worth it. The Word of God proclaims the ending of a thing is way better then its beginning. (Ecc 7:8)
The ending will produce the desired fruit of rightful living, being subject to truth of the word and walking there in. Faith without my work is dead. Just as work without faith is dead. Being the doer of the word is what is changing within me. Not being driven by my flesh in the emotion it feels and the logic that my mind can twist together.
God wants me to prosper in my soul firstly, heal some wounds of the soul, reshape how I process things from a new way that is contrary to how I was raised and brought up. The blooms of a new life are what I so hope to see as I endeavor to make these shifts from being combative, viewing through wounds of rejection and embrace the reality of who I am, confess it and grow from it.
So, today I choose to do SOMETHING! That will benefit changing the trajectory of my life!
Visit my teespring store to shop my selections: sample pillow below
Living during the time of a global Pandemic (COVID-19)
I’m not even gonna lie, this whole quarantine/shutdown has been hard on me. Truthfully, it revealed to me just how much of an extrovert I am now. I am very much an ambivert, but I lean more extrovert in nature. I do have times of goin and being alone to recollect myself, but those times are fewer then the desire to be with people.
This quarantine has taken me to a place within my emotional realm that I couldn’t take much more of the pressure and erupted like a volcano, spewing out toxic lava from my innermost being out onto those closest to me. Like the aftermath of any natural disaster, my own aftermath left things in not good places for days and it will continue on in the weeks and months ahead to recover.
By Easter Sunday I was completely tapped of everything and decided to go for a walk to a nearby place I haven’t ventured to yet. So, I waited some to allow the traffic there to slow down some before I set out to clear my head, connect in nature and just “be”.
I needed that the most to just “be”.
Being Super Woman has its limitations when your acting within your own strength and by this time I was severely depleted. It was so peaceful and calm the serenity of where I went to walk that I do ever so long to go again.
I basked in the solitude of the quietness of nature. I wasn’t being demanded of to solve a problem. I was allowed to feel small in a big world, with a huge problem, and the desperate need of a savior. This walk I will call my repentance walk for everything I had attributed to in the week prior to not being very Christ-like at all.
I journeyed out from the Park where I took my walk, of which I will share more photos from at the end of this blog, to visit some stores for essentials. To my grand dismay many were closed up so tight that not even a fly could penetrate their barriers. This didn’t set well with me once more. This whole mess has brought out the spoiled child within me dealing with only first world problems.
When if I took a reality check my issues are minor compares to others. Many are battling this horrendous COVID-19 aka Corona Virus to the point of loss of life on epic scales. Many have lost jobs and income flows due to Gov’t/State regulations to lessen the curve peak of this virus to not destroy the fragile health care system in which would be needed to treat massive amounts of this virus. This virus and everything happening is a history in the making.
Many states are now extending the orders to stay at home and many essential businesses have had to come up to Governor mandated codes for protecting the public and essential workers. As of 5pm on Monday, the state in which I reside had new rules that came into implementation. We have had to limit the number of patrons inside the building, we have had to provide a hand sanitization of some kind. Prepare barriers between customers and checkout attendants.
So Friday of the week prior to the codes going into effect. I had to bring the establishment where I work up to code as being in tele-communications that is deemed an essential business. I had my own science project to make home made Clorox wipes to provide some kind of hand sanitation to customers as hand sanitizer in itself is sold out. The governors order stated the need to establish a time for senior customers, create a flow of one way into and out of stores and even within create flows for isles of grocery goods and shut down/limit use of any public restrooms. I rigged up a clear shower curtain to act as a barrier and after customers environmental cleaning has to be done to slow down the spread of this virus.
By the time Monday came I was so far over it all that waking up to find tornado warnings and hearing news of tornado strikes it just made the whole of the day so dark. Mind you I was still recovering from the dark night of the soul I just walked through to walk out into more darkness. It has all been too much for my soul to entertain.
Tuesday came and it seemed better it was bright and sunshine of the day cheered my dark soul up some. At one point I was able to just go sit by the water and pray for a moment and seek some stillness for my innermost being that has been so loud that I needed an escape.
By Wednesday, recovery was probably at the half way mark and yet still a need to know how to fix my innermost being from potentially not having to go through this again as the pandemic remains. My eyes had to be enlightened to somethings about myself that I must learn from, and grow up out of, as well as, begin to tame.
I am set to charge down the things within me that need to be shifted and changed during these hard and stressful times. As I am taught, fruit only comes during the hardest of trials. For me this whole situation the last few months have been the hardest yet, and to be honest we none know when the end will be insight. The best I can do is learn and grow and make the most of this time. I have made some masks from scarfs (3 finished one incomplete) and have completed one pillow and another pillow to be made. While I wasn’t in a good place I stopped the work on my second book until I recover. I am not sure what else I may take up to fill my time.
My greatest hope is that all this will be over soon and we can return to some sense of normalcy.
“We will sing for joy over your victory, And in the name of our God we will set up our banners. May the LORD fulfill all your petitions.” Psalms 20:5 NASB
Thank you for taking time to enjoy my blog🌹
Visit my teespring store to shop my selections inspired by my book
I don’t know about the rest of my readers, but this whole thing has taken my stress level to a new all time high!
Every day the rules change! Every day things are getting more scarce! Every day a new way to go about daily life is implemented!
When all this began it wasn’t to the level that it is now. Back then social distancing was a thing that was new. Then limits on how many people could get together. Then stores shutting down that were deemed non essential. Dining facilities closed, but allowing for take out or drive threw only.
Now government offices are closed. How you pay your bills has drastically changed many have closed down in person transactions and implemented non personal contact to conduct business. As of late we are now encouraged to wear masks when interacting in the public.
So, I had seen a tutorial on how to make some inexpensive cloth masks. So, I made some to have on hand. Even some extra to give to someone, but that changed so now I will just wait and see how things go, as I may need them as I still have to deal with public on the regular.
My daily living is constantly being challenged and constantly changing to the point its hard to keep up. So much so that its affecting my interpersonal stuff. But thats a whole blog post in itself that I will spare the world from of the betrayal and revealing of the truth of the matter that folks will stand hard with people who shorted them in things and use another to get what they want and just discard folk. But, thats ok like any other situation. It will only make me stronger!
In my down time yesterday, I needed an escape. An escape from everything! An escape from people! An escape from feeling closed in! An escape from feeling like my freedoms I still had weren’t being taken away. So, on my way home I took a brief detour. I visited the tulip fields that the near by Dutch heritage farmers plant yearly.
It was such a moment of pure escape that a storm began to creep up on me and I had to leave the experience. But, learning in these times to stop, slow down and experience life in a different way from the hustle and bustle is what this Pandemic is doing.
Earlier this past weekend I stopped to smell the roses and brought them home! They have opened up so beautifully the look like lil sunbursts on my desk.
The place I have found to go for walks has slowly been closing down parts to the public to implement social distancing and from large groups to be gathering. The fishing piers are slowly being closed off to prevent many from being in same close place together. Stores have begun to have door ways locked to deter inflow and outflow. A major chain box store only allows one way in and one way out currently. Gas stations are beginning to do the same.
So, what would be my encouragement to you in all this as I am sure other more impacted areas are having tighter restricitions.
Live the life you have been given to the best of your ability while staying safe and abiding the laws of the land. Is it fun or easy right now? No! To be honest I have complained the whole way through, now it is time for me to see the silver lining in it and keep putting one foot in front of the other.
So, when on my most recent walk to the park I took some pics of things I hadn’t really payed attention to out there before. I will share them below:
One thing I will take away from all this is that sometimes its best to go back to just looking after your own self and taking care of your mental health.
“Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;” Romans 12:12 KJV
If you made it to the end of my blog thank you for taking the time to read and enjoy it! I hope it helps encourage you during these hard times!
Visit my teespring store to shop some of the selections I have created!
“Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4 NASB
I am not sure how others are being impacted from this fully, but what I can share is how it is impacting me in my life and in my spiritual life.
My daily life during this COVID-19 epidemic has been what I feel like is drastically effected. In the state if NC in the USA we are under orders to stay at home! This has shut down many nonessential businesses at this point. Restaurant dining areas closed, only allowed to do take-out/carry-out/delivery. Nail, hair and tattoo salons are closed. Any store that doesn’t sell food, medicine or animal care products were forced to close their doors if not prior to the March 31st declaration by the governor.
Many are out of work, been laid off, and forced to seek unemployment. The President pushed for an economic stimulus that took Congress two weeks to get approved by both parties before it could even be presented for the president to sign. Lets just say one side had to be sure to push their agenda while Americans are suffering from loss of income.
The company in which I work for is deemed an essential business, so I am still at work. But, I am also on the front line of seeing the business take another major hit, being that I live in the Carolinas we are often in the lat summer hit by hurricanes as we have been hit hard the last two years by major hurricanes.
This virus is like an invisible hurricane thats coming and we don’t know yet the full impact it will have, but what we do know is that it is causing massive financial and economic destruction. The health care systems to the harder hit areas are taking major blows from being without some essential medical supplies.
Store chains cannot keep food, paper products and more on their shelfs due to the pandemonium created to stock up and hoard. This whole crisis has elevated this to a new level to be seen in the natural.
It needed to be seen that the majority of Americans pharmaceuticals are manufactured in China; as well as, the fact that most medical equipment like hospital gowns, gloves, facial masks are made in China. The push is now being made to bring the manufacture of those items home. In time after the peak of this whole crisis I pray some normalcy to our daily lives can be restored, but taking what we learned from this time with us.
This is showing the importance of taking time away and being with the ones you love! Take time to build and work on things that work, school, or life distracts you from doing. This has allowed me time to begin to build my second book I am gonna write. This has allowed me time to perfect skills to learn things. This time has pushed me in a direction that is called GROWTH.
That growth stems into my spiritual life as well! With houses if worship closed down to prevent the spread of the virus, it is a time in which will reveal just how much faith I have during times like these. It has been a hard press for me to remain of faith and not succumb to the daily tales of fear propagated stories of this very serious matter.
I have also been so challenged to grow in my walk with the Lord that it be more relational driven then genie in a bottle driven so to speak. God is not a wish granter only! He is a God who wants to see his children grow and mature to reflect His nature in the earth. Now can I say, that some spots of growth are a hard press. Likened to the lotus it has to fight through the murk and mire to grow to the surface to see the light and bloom.
My flesh has to die under the surface of the waters as if to say in a regeneration process so that what comes forth on the surface is the new nature that has the ability to glorify God. The outstretch of faith that has to take place requires much patients to grow in things and get me to a place that inwardly I will be lacking nothing! Maturity causes you to reach a level of stability in the inner life that I so desperately need.
When this comes, I will be able to withstand storms better, my flesh can be more under the subjection to the spirit. My faith will be firmly established in truth from the word if God. This is what growth and maturity can and will do, when I allow it to happen!
“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 NKJV
I sit here in the silence, asking God what is the message for me and the blog I write once a week? No sooner I asked, and got silent within, I heard “be of good cheer!”
The great Abba Father that He is sent a message into my spirit one of comfort to reinforce peace in my life. The event of this week have been a major pull on my logic and emotions! I even confessed to my spiritual leader in the faith that I felt myself slipping into a depressive state. She encouraged me with words of comfort and wisdom as she always does.
“When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.” Psalms 94:19 NASB
I got home and had to force my way into worship, I forced my way into looking at the word to renew as I was only in the early state of emotional slipping before emotions fully intoxicated me and I was very unrenewed.
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” Romans 12:2 NKJV
Even as of yesterday, I had to plant myself before the word and remain in it, I got home to cook dinner for my father and freely worshipped, prayed in my heavenly language and then began to feel peace as small as a pebble.
The message I received of “be of good cheer” was a timely one. God knows that in these uncertain times it is faith that will pull us through. Faith isnt a ticket out of tribulation, faith is a hope through dire times. As things continually are getting shut down, enforcement to remain home becomes more essential, that our health and lively hoods are being greatly effected.
As of today more nonessential places are forced to close at 5pm for two weeks. People that have non essential jobs are out of work. Others that have employment that are essential are still allowed to work at this time as more and more cases of confirmed COVID-19 are coming out. Many are now instituting curfews to help condense the probability of spreading this virus! May Hod be with us all during this!
This is the virus heard round the world at this point! By faith we will make it!
By faith anchor in truth of the Word of God!
“For men swear by one greater than themselves, and with them an oath given as confirmation is an end of every dispute. In the same way God, desiring even more to show to the heirs of the promise the unchangeableness of His purpose, interposed with an oath, so that by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have taken refuge would have strong encouragement to take hold of the hope set before us. This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, a hope both sure and steadfast and one which enters within the veil,” Hebrews 6:16-19 NASB
The days in which we live currently are becoming consumed by fear all around!
“But understand this, that in the last days dangerous times [of great stress and trouble] will come [difficult days that will be hard to bear].” 2 Timothy 3:1 AMP
I considered blogging long and hard especially with the current climate of the world. So, instead of my usual, I figured I would share how my life and world are being hit by the COVID-19 epidemic, and share some faith so we can stand firm and make it through these times.
In the past few days, every grocery store I have entered, beef and chicken products are all emptied, bread of all kinds gone. Can goods flying off the shelf left and right! Milk and eggs being purchased by the cart loads. Products of lysol, bleach, hand sanitizer, any disinfectant spray were off the shelf for a week prior to all this.
As of the most recent event of this virus, many stores are required to close early, restaurants are only allowed to do take out or delivery. Communal dining areas are fully shut down. People are loosing jobs due to having to close early, especially those in the restaurant and bar industry.
The economic effects of this will take weeks to rebound from, granted the gov’t has a proposed stimulus plan, but only time will tell how that helps. More cases are popping up, social distancing has been widely promoted.
All during these passing weeks I have been trying my best to put faith over fear! The statics, the forecasting, the foreboding of it all insight and harbors fear. Pulling from the Word of God has been a must or fear will consume anyone in these times.
“He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.” Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler And from the perilous pestilence. He shall cover you with His feathers, And under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler. You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, Nor of the arrow that flies by day, Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday. A thousand may fall at your side, And ten thousand at your right hand; But it shall not come near you. Only with your eyes shall you look, And see the reward of the wicked. Because you have made the LORD, who is my refuge, Even the Most High, your dwelling place, No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways. In their hands they shall bear you up, Lest you dash your foot against a stone. You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra, The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot. “Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high, because he has known My name. He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him, And show him My salvation.”” Psalms 91:1-16 NKJV
Be watchful of the traps people set for you on your path of life!
“Establish my footsteps in Your word…” Psalms 119:133 NASB
When your in a season of growth and development, many want to come along and hinder that growth!
When your trying as hard as you can to change in areas that need to be changed in to only be told things that only cause you depression, the notion to give up, walk away from God, walk away from the church and spiritual family… those are things I have had to learn to become aware of and take a stand up against. Many see it as being combative and it is, but when you are run down you have every right to defend yourself!
But the moment you do that you become the bad guy, your messing with a call on someones life, your twisted, sick, immature and how you are is unacceptable. Never mind what they did, said or how they took the situation and said things that were hurtful. So yes, I in-turn unleashed hurtful things as a retaliation.
The bible says turn the other cheek, but baby I can assure you that is hard for this one to do. I took hurtful, hateful words most all my life and I will not just take them anymore! You cause me pain, I will cause you pain in return!
Is that being petty?
Is it mature?
When your a wounded soul fight or flight is an automatic response mechanism! Will I justify what I have done to harm another? Already done that by blaming it on wounds and by retaliating because sore places within me are touched!
The only thing now to do is keep on walking! (Psalm 119:133)
Seek forgiveness from the Lord and plead mercy on the reaping that will take place from all thats been sown!
When your cover is blown seek the refuge of the shelter of the wings (Psalm 91).
“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust!” For it is He who delivers you from the snare of the trapper And from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His pinions, And under His wings you may seek refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark. You will not be afraid of the terror by night, Or of the arrow that flies by day; Of the pestilence that stalks in darkness, Or of the destruction that lays waste at noon. A thousand may fall at your side And ten thousand at your right hand, But it shall not approach you. You will only look on with your eyes And see the recompense of the wicked. For you have made the LORD, my refuge, Even the Most High, your dwelling place. No evil will befall you, Nor will any plague come near your tent. For He will give His angels charge concerning you, To guard you in all your ways. They will bear you up in their hands, That you do not strike your foot against a stone. You will tread upon the lion and cobra, The young lion and the serpent you will trample down. “Because he has loved Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name. He will call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him. With a long life I will satisfy him And let him see My salvation.”” Psalms 91:1-16 NASB