Life Changes During A Global Pandemic

In life, the time will never be right, but when God presents an opportunity; it is then up to us to trust the presentation and take a step of faith!

“Listen carefully, I am about to do a new thing, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even put a road in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.”
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭43:19‬ ‭AMP‬‬

I’ve written about this before somewhere I am sure, but the relevancy is so present in my life the month of February that it needs to be expressed again. Many times we pray to God for things like: “God, I need a new job” or “God, I want someone to love me for who I am” or “God, I need you to make changes around me”.

But what happens when the new job opportunity comes and you decide to stay where you are at.

What happens when the guy/girl comes along that will love you for who you are, but they are outside of your type.

What happens when God wants to change something about your character instead of fully removing you from situations, he wants to perfect something in you, but all you see is the error of others and not your own.

We have all in some way or another done one if not all three of those things I’ve mentioned. I know I have! But, what I’ve had to grow into and learn is to seek God about what He is wanting to do, trying to do, and presenting in my life. Now, not everything is from God, this is why we must turn to the Lord in prayer to find out the storyline behind things.

“Trust in and rely confidently on the LORD with all your heart And do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know and acknowledge and recognize Him, And He will make your paths straight and smooth [removing obstacles that block your way].”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3:5-6‬ ‭AMP‬‬

If I hadn’t sat my pride down in moment when I wanted out and allowed God to work through my character defects, would I have been able to eventually get a breakthrough in an area thats been long barred from exiting. No! Had I not done the work which allowed God to use an individual to help me grow from my character defects to help promote me to my next level of an opportunity that came that would remove things like poverty, low self worth, and intense levels of anxiety, high levels of offense that none of those things would translate to where God was able to move me to had the work I needed done on my soul not been achieved.

I have so many more character flaws and defects to work through and overcome, but I am committed to making the changes I need to in this life. To improve my quality of life in all areas, as well as, preparing me for when the next opportunity comes in; which I pray is divine partnership of two Godly people. So, since its not presented I may not be ready yet and thats cool, cause I can work out the kinks I need to before they show up to make sure that I am not bringing in more fuel to a situation that the enemy fights against! Oh yeah Satan hates seeing Godly partnerships, so anything I can do now to not allow him a foot hold when that time comes I am all for slamming that door shut by doin the work I need to do on myself.

Thank you for your time in reading my blog!

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💞Cynthia💞

Incredibly Stressful Week

“When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭94:19‬ ‭NASB

Learning to cope and manage my stress levels has been and is one of the most daunting and laborious tasks. I am far from having any great success in it as I am still so deeply learning the concepts of time management, being aware of my emotions, learning to step back and self-parent, learning when to reach out for counsel, and more…

On Saturday and Sunday after I blogged, I cleaned house, did laundry, grocery shopped and began mea prep, I successfully got a lasagna made that my dad (of whom I am a caregiver to) enjoyed. I made a large crockpot of spaghetti and got all the clothes put away, floors cleaned then my Post Covid fatigue hit me so hard like a ton of bricks before I could bake the lasagna and prep my lunches for the week. That it took an hour to recover to even wash the dishes before i had to stop to fight the tinnitus flair, sinus swelling flair and the body just not wanting to cooperate.

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I did all this last weekend in the knowing that two days would be spent beating a many a road taking my dad to his first covid test that is now mandatory before any procedure, then taking him for breakfast, to then head a completely different direction to take a drug test, to then leave there to head to my current place of employment. That night I had to sketch out an entire day of a liquid diet for my father to follow as I would be at work and he would need to partake of the liquids I had acquired to have a successful procedure the next day. He called a few times in frustration wanting solid food and not understanding the plan of his diet. After got him settled and ok it was then time to map out his plan of his intake of solutions before his procedure and account for travel time as all this had to be done within a certain length of time. Needless to say the day of the procedure went smooth (Thank God).

Youtube being a Caregiver

This all happening while working one job, that is in total freak out mode as of the end of January, I will be leaving and moving on to new horizons. So light transitional contact will have to be there til they have more sure footing.

I know that my level of dedication, work ethic that had been above and beyond any call of duty, my level of sacrifice will not be matched. However, I do know that some level of my work is “replaceable”, for that I am no fool. When the value of a person that had done so much for so little is not appreciated or seen the value in, all the more revealing of a time to move on. For some, my missing presence will be felt, for others I am sure could careless if I am out of their life. I have had to grow to a place of knowing when to hold em and when to fold em so to speak.

I am learning to become grateful of weeks like this past week. I could have gotten offended, walled off, shut down, and gone completely off the deep end, instead I looked at every lesson as an opportunity to grow in some way. Whether it be identifying a trigger reaction within myself, realizing a level of pride that needs humbling, or seeing when I am in my flesh and not living by the spirit.

It is in this year 2021, that I want to change more of who I am in developing a Godly character in things that I long need to develop them in. I want to bot only manifest this next step that has been supported and governed by prayer and my prayer partners. That I want to manifest some big things into my life this year as well, things still unseen in the natural, but my spirit embraces them, my subconscious see’s the manifestation and my conscious faith will pull it into reality.

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Faith Moves Mountains

“For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.”
‭‭Mark‬ ‭11:23‬ ‭KJV‬‬

More and more as I journey along the road of life and the life as a believer in Jesus Christ, at different junctures we will often need a new level of faith. For unto us a measure was given, it then becomes our job to work that faith, grow the faith, and manifest from that faith.

Back in 2017 God had to put me in a place to grow my faith to believe for a vehicle after mine put me down. He had already begun to soften my heart when I was already half way through a negativity detox of my soul. He also made sure to surround me with people that would encourage that faith and help keep the fire stoked to see a manifestation of God opening opportunity when every odd was against me to obtain a new/used vehicle.

I had to grow that level of faith from the measure I was given as a believer. As time passed and that level of faith saw me through my battle with COVID and survived to talk about it, show to others God at work in my COVID battle and more. When you hit the end of a grade level and pass the test, your often sent to the next level, it will be new, it will take an even greater faith in that next level.

But, what about the grey area of passing the test and then the next grade promotion? Reflect on the lessons learned, see how you don’t just allow anyone in your ear to convince you that your choices are wrong. See how you have grown and showed strength instead of emotionalism. See how your able to stand for what you are truly worth instead of what others may see you as to keep an upper hand on you!

In the grey area, real hearts are exposed!

In the grey area agendas are revealed!

In the grey area you see that folks purposely withheld!

In the grey area you see truth and please don’t ignore it!

I have so much more to grow in as it relates to faith so that more mountains can be moved. I have of recent had ear-mites “attempt” to deter my path by saying things of “I wish you went to a mega church so you can find your husband” or “I wish you luck in what your about to do and I hope it works out”!

I stopped them in those moment and said I am going to church where I am supposed to be going. Your opinion of that holds no relevance and my husband of whom God will send yes will be a church going man! When the time comes God will send him to visit my church. God works in the small better then he ever will in the “mega”! I also stopped the one about my current choices and I said boldly that yes it will work out! For they have no idea of the mountain it was to cross. These folks that said this may have been an “elder” in age, but the wisdom of God supersedes that when His spirit is in something and not the opinions of flesh and folks that have lived their life already!

When peoples opinions or the worlds opinions hold you back from something God has His hand upon its time to take a look at the hand you allow to steer your life.

Have you allowed the worlds view of money rule your every decision? If so, holding on to the energy of money only keeps it away from you! Freely giving of finances is an energy that creates an open flow.

When you allow “peers” to influence your choice of church because of their ideals that is an energy of control that we must be careful of. The energy of free-will is God-given, exercise it. Fast, pray, seek outside council to help you hear from God on what is destined for your life.

Folks may have “somewhat” good intentions in mind, but not every intention is pure in nature. Be wise and seek answers before choosing based on someone else’s life choices. Cause in the end it will be your faith and what of it you choose to operate from that will help you move mountains in life and reach your destiny!

💞Thank you for reading! 💞

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⚜️Cynthia⚜️

Happy April!

Be Full of Joy & Patient in Hope

“Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
‭‭James‬ ‭1:2-4‬ ‭NASB‬‬

I am not sure how others are being impacted from this fully, but what I can share is how it is impacting me in my life and in my spiritual life.

My daily life during this COVID-19 epidemic has been what I feel like is drastically effected. In the state if NC in the USA we are under orders to stay at home! This has shut down many nonessential businesses at this point. Restaurant dining areas closed, only allowed to do take-out/carry-out/delivery. Nail, hair and tattoo salons are closed. Any store that doesn’t sell food, medicine or animal care products were forced to close their doors if not prior to the March 31st declaration by the governor.

Many are out of work, been laid off, and forced to seek unemployment. The President pushed for an economic stimulus that took Congress two weeks to get approved by both parties before it could even be presented for the president to sign. Lets just say one side had to be sure to push their agenda while Americans are suffering from loss of income.

The company in which I work for is deemed an essential business, so I am still at work. But, I am also on the front line of seeing the business take another major hit, being that I live in the Carolinas we are often in the lat summer hit by hurricanes as we have been hit hard the last two years by major hurricanes.

This virus is like an invisible hurricane thats coming and we don’t know yet the full impact it will have, but what we do know is that it is causing massive financial and economic destruction. The health care systems to the harder hit areas are taking major blows from being without some essential medical supplies.

Store chains cannot keep food, paper products and more on their shelfs due to the pandemonium created to stock up and hoard. This whole crisis has elevated this to a new level to be seen in the natural.

It needed to be seen that the majority of Americans pharmaceuticals are manufactured in China; as well as, the fact that most medical equipment like hospital gowns, gloves, facial masks are made in China. The push is now being made to bring the manufacture of those items home. In time after the peak of this whole crisis I pray some normalcy to our daily lives can be restored, but taking what we learned from this time with us.

This is showing the importance of taking time away and being with the ones you love! Take time to build and work on things that work, school, or life distracts you from doing. This has allowed me time to begin to build my second book I am gonna write. This has allowed me time to perfect skills to learn things. This time has pushed me in a direction that is called GROWTH.

That growth stems into my spiritual life as well! With houses if worship closed down to prevent the spread of the virus, it is a time in which will reveal just how much faith I have during times like these. It has been a hard press for me to remain of faith and not succumb to the daily tales of fear propagated stories of this very serious matter.

I have also been so challenged to grow in my walk with the Lord that it be more relational driven then genie in a bottle driven so to speak. God is not a wish granter only! He is a God who wants to see his children grow and mature to reflect His nature in the earth. Now can I say, that some spots of growth are a hard press. Likened to the lotus it has to fight through the murk and mire to grow to the surface to see the light and bloom.

My flesh has to die under the surface of the waters as if to say in a regeneration process so that what comes forth on the surface is the new nature that has the ability to glorify God. The outstretch of faith that has to take place requires much patients to grow in things and get me to a place that inwardly I will be lacking nothing! Maturity causes you to reach a level of stability in the inner life that I so desperately need.

When this comes, I will be able to withstand storms better, my flesh can be more under the subjection to the spirit. My faith will be firmly established in truth from the word if God. This is what growth and maturity can and will do, when I allow it to happen!

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🌺Cynthia 🌺

Thank you all for taking the time to read my blog!

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Keep on Walking

Be watchful of the traps people set for you on your path of life!

“Establish my footsteps in Your word…”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭119:133‬ ‭NASB‬‬

When your in a season of growth and development, many want to come along and hinder that growth!

When your trying as hard as you can to change in areas that need to be changed in to only be told things that only cause you depression, the notion to give up, walk away from God, walk away from the church and spiritual family… those are things I have had to learn to become aware of and take a stand up against. Many see it as being combative and it is, but when you are run down you have every right to defend yourself!

But the moment you do that you become the bad guy, your messing with a call on someones life, your twisted, sick, immature and how you are is unacceptable. Never mind what they did, said or how they took the situation and said things that were hurtful. So yes, I in-turn unleashed hurtful things as a retaliation.

The bible says turn the other cheek, but baby I can assure you that is hard for this one to do. I took hurtful, hateful words most all my life and I will not just take them anymore! You cause me pain, I will cause you pain in return!

Is that being petty?

Yes!

Is it mature?

No!

When your a wounded soul fight or flight is an automatic response mechanism! Will I justify what I have done to harm another? Already done that by blaming it on wounds and by retaliating because sore places within me are touched!

The only thing now to do is keep on walking! (Psalm 119:133)

Seek forgiveness from the Lord and plead mercy on the reaping that will take place from all thats been sown!

When your cover is blown seek the refuge of the shelter of the wings (Psalm 91).

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust!” For it is He who delivers you from the snare of the trapper And from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His pinions, And under His wings you may seek refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark. You will not be afraid of the terror by night, Or of the arrow that flies by day; Of the pestilence that stalks in darkness, Or of the destruction that lays waste at noon. A thousand may fall at your side And ten thousand at your right hand, But it shall not approach you. You will only look on with your eyes And see the recompense of the wicked. For you have made the LORD, my refuge, Even the Most High, your dwelling place. No evil will befall you, Nor will any plague come near your tent. For He will give His angels charge concerning you, To guard you in all your ways. They will bear you up in their hands, That you do not strike your foot against a stone. You will tread upon the lion and cobra, The young lion and the serpent you will trample down. “Because he has loved Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name. He will call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him. With a long life I will satisfy him And let him see My salvation.””
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭91:1-16‬ ‭NASB
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Cynthia 💞

Embracing Singleness

Relationship Status in a world that makes it idolized to be of a certain status!

In a world where status is everything so it seems, the world promotes that if your not married then your practically nothing.

To say the least many of us have cosigned with that mindset. But, is it true what they claim?

NO!

I can attest that being single is NOT the end all be all of our existence and neither is marriage. Both have their place in the world and in the church. Married folks (successful marriages) should be encouraged to pour wisdom into singles to help prepare them for their time.

Godly marriages have come along side me in my recent years and have helped burst the false bubbles of fantasy and instill reality and wisdom in the approach to relationships. I first had to embrace the fact that marriage is a long-term successful friendship.

Once I got this I was then challenged to learn to walk in love, this love walk was the one without conditions, boy thats been a challenge. Its been a growing pain of growing from where I once was cold to seeing some fruit of growth how be it ever small, but growth is growth.

The successful marriages showed me that even if marriage doesn’t come I need to learn to love myself and my journey. If someone comes along thats traveling the same road and we can go at it together great, if not; I still have a purpose and call of God to fulfill. Embracing this has brought a level of freedom that no matter my status I still have purpose.

I still have bouts of struggle with this from time to time, I won’t lie about that. Thats our human nature and a good one to have as long as its not our driving force. I was reminded once again to seek first the kingdom of God and all His righteousness them all those things can be added to me.

So, if you struggle being single, know that your not alone. Trust in God and His timing. Work on yourself, love yourself, enjoy yourself! Live life, love others, bring joy to those you can around you. Sow seeds of goodness and kindness where you can.

Love yourself enough to wait on the goodness of the Lord! Trust your preparation season, trust the growth, trust in the Love of the Father! He knows what He is doing, he loves you enough to keep you growing before you mess up any good thing He sends your way!

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End of the Road

What to do when you reach the end?

Often times in this life we hit endings! I would hit endings and be completley devistated!

Why you ask?

Well…

For many reason. Some being unmet expectations, things done on my own without consulting God about it, or wounds within my soul that sought out validation from sources that had no capacity to fulfill them!

These endings have saved me from a deeper life of pain than I could have felt had I gotten my way in life!

Relationships that didnt workout, churches that didnt work out, jobs that didnt work out! All of the path that I have been on has lead me here to where I am at currently today!

Life lessons have to be learned and often times, well more often than not in my case I took the lesson and blew it way out of proportion.

What I needed to learn was simple!

What I needed to grow in was simple!

What I needed to then walk in was simple!

But how I have done the understanding of these things is, take them as far out of context as I could and made mountains out of mole hills!

Coming to the end of the road is this….

A dead end…

What has to happen at the end of a dead end?

You have to go back up that path, see what you didn’t see before, take the lesson with you, and get back on your predestined path!

Endings aren’t always fun or enjoyable, but they can be incredible times of growth and rediscovery! How we view the ending is up to our perception! It is based on whats in our soul.

Your soul may need healing like mine still does and will continue to need! Seek help for what is goin on in your head and heart! Investing in a therapist has been the greatest way to love myself and get the help I need!

To that I say Happy Endings to this blog 🙂

Thank you for reading!

Cynthia

Waiting Is Hard – Leibester Award

Allowing your soul to enter a space of wait is difficult.

So many in this day and age and yes I include myself in this find it easy to get caught up in everything. We see people doing things we wanted to do, having things we want to have, etc. This over time if not handled properly can create idolitry, causes comparison, leads to self-works. Can cause strife, bitterness, pride and many other things.

I wait for the Lord , my soul doth wait, and in his word do I hope.
Psalms 130:5 KJV

Doing things in self-work eventually wears you down. Cause if it is outside the will of God for your life you will find a constant depletion of energy. Working and doing things within Gods will, will still be work, just not exhaustive work. Many times we know we are operating outside his will as we have no peace thus causing exhaustion. We entertain worry, doubt, fear of losing what we worked to get

Allowing God to do things on His time will save you peace and energy. Gods time is outside of our time. Thats why many times we get caught up in the notion God isn’t working or moving I got to do it all myself. He is at work, He is moving, perhaps not in the way hoped. He wants to develop character, integrity, fruit, prudence in your life before bringing things waited for.

Allowing waiting to be a time of preparation shifts focus from what you don’t have to what can I grow and develop in, in my here and now. In states of self-work we are consumed with obtaining what we waited for so much it can blind us to things we need to see that could be hurt down the road. When our focus shifts blinders come off and then we can see the real deal of reality.

We have to allow waiting to be seen in our mind as a preparation time and not as a punishment. Believe me having that kind of mindset keeps you in a defeated place. Grow in womanhood or manhood. Grow in God dive into His word and study it out. Be part of a church that leads you to growth in spirit, soul and body (1 Thess 5:23). Learn to take charge of your mind and shift it by renewal (Romans 12:1-2 & Eph 4:23). Having the right Pastor, Spiritual mother and father makes a huge difference. I know I am thankful for mine.

They know there are things I am waiting on God to bring and do in my life. They pour into me to help me get renewed to shift my mind back if I gone astray and its causing character defects. I will keep waiting patiently, all the while growing, developing and praying until doors open. This keeps me in a place of operating in faith with works.

I pray this encourages anyone waiting for things to happen in their life.

For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.
Habakkuk 2:3 KJV

Visit my Pastors links below every tuesday she does a live facebook teaching. Check it out!!

Leibester Award

Many gracious thanks to Laura M Bailey of All The Shoes I Wear for this nomination and sharing my blog space with your followers. Be sure to visit her blog 🙂

RULES

Acknowledge the blogger that gave it to you and display the award

Answer 11 questions that the blogger gave you.

Nominate 5 other bloggers and notify them of their nomination

“This award is meant to encourage new bloggers. From The Global Aussie: “The earliest case of the award goes as far back as 2011. Liebster in German means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome.”

To my Nominees, choose any or all the question above OR you may instead, list 11 random facts about yourself.

My Random 11 Facts

  1. I am part of a wonderful church family at Reformation Developmental Center in Tarboro, NC. Pastored by the amazing Juanita Gibbs of whom is a Pastor, Blogger, Life Coach, Author and Professor, Inspiritation to many on many ways. She has helped culivate my writing, ordained me as a youth teacher and has helped uncover gifts, talents and abilities within me.
  2. I love being a youth teacher to my lil joys and developing lesson and plans to bring the word of God to them on their level
  3. I enjoy writing and studying the word.
  4. I will be an author one day.
  5. I enjoy a cup of coffee
  6. I love Lush Cosmetics for their Sleepy lotion and bath bombs
  7. I love doing administrative works
  8. I enjoy encouraging people
  9. I love Mexican food
  10. I want to travel to many foreign destinations.
  11. Photography I love

My Nominees Are…..

Kelleydiy

Kathleenriley777

Saving Joyfully

Queenie

Laci, McGee Travel Tales

Freedom by Faith

Escaping Prison!

I have come to learn that how I am doesn’t always like the truth. I woukd take a lie as truth in a hot minute over the true truth.

This has kept me in prison if sorts. A prison of deception and hindered growth, maturity in areas, as well as, enforced a stronghold of deception in my mind.

How did I know I was in prison?

Well…

When truth has come I fight it. God has been very instrumental in using my Pastor Juanita Gibbs in my life. She is a realist and operates from realness and truth and this has been very much what I needed in my life.

Someone who would keep it real and genuine and yet still love me when the reality of my truth has surfaced.

Not many people are mature or capable within to handle another persons truth. So many will sit back and pass judgement and pray not spiritual prayers this creating an even bigger problem.

and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”
John 8:32 NASB

To be set free I have to continually see the truth so it can cut the bonds of deception to release its hold within my soul.

Slowly freedom is coming, but I first had to see I was in a prison of my own making. God had nothing to do with me being in a prison of deception, I chose to be there by my choices.

He has given us the power of choice to walk in deception or to be free. We can walk around and knowingly or unknowingly be deceiving people.

But self-control allows us to choose to knowingly or unknowingly accept or reject the deception of others.

We shall know the truth and the truth alone makes us free!

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~Cynthia 😍

Faith Planted

Our old nature has to die to produce goodness!

When faith is planted inside our spirit and we begin to attend church regularly, we read and study the word on our own something begins to happen.

That faith begins to crack open inside us and push out that which is not of God. Its in the exercising of that measure that I blogged on yesterday. Becoming a doer of the word, by applying it and walking it out.

My Pastor Juanita Gibbs often reminds us that we must not only be a hearer of the word but also a doer. Hearing builds faith within us, as doing the word helps change us.

Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. John 12:24 KJV

Its in that doing and hearing when change comes that the good fruit can begin to come forth. Where I once was selfish, stingy, impatient, and prideful begin to shed. Now love, peace, patience, meekness can grow.

Its a lifetime of work to keep fruit growing as there are always places revealed in me that they can grow and improve in. But faith had to come in to cause the old to die out. When the seed of faith planted and cracked open it was on me to nourish it and watch my faith grow.

I’m not quite where I would like to be in it, but with my Pastors help andthe help of the Lord by His word I’m not where I was. I am determined to keep taking steps to grow my faith and produce the goodness of God in my life.

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~Cynthia 😍