Tis the season

The most happiest time of the year can be really not so joyful for some!

DEPRESSION AWARENESS

The condition of Depression became so much more very real in my family in the December of 2014.

Depression was already in my home prior to 2014 goin back to 2007 truthfully, but not on this level. My Father was severly depressed in October that same year of 2014 he spent about a week or more in the hospital from severe bleeding ulcers that requires him to have clamps put on them and several blood transfusions.

When he came home after that, my father wasn’t the same man. He couldn’t return to work without collapsing, he then spent time at home and after spending most of his life working in the public that came to a screeching hault. So, like my mother’s carrer came to and aburupt stop, so did his.

They spent alot of time together at home as something neither of them was use to spending long extended amounts of time with each other alone since me and my sibling came along. So with them both spending time alone and both in a state of depression, that the condition took a turn in early December.

One day my mother calls me and my sibling also very frantic that my father opened all his pills and took them. She called is then called Emergency. They took him to the ER and evaluated him and asked what he took we had gathered the scattered pills and bottles as my mom, wheel chair bound rolled to knock them from his hand and being taken.

They kept him in the ER for hours and mt father wasn’t there. He knew my mom and my brother, but he didn’t know me. That was heartbreaking to hear from darkend cold eyes from the man responsible for you coming into the world that “no I dont know who you are”.

I left the room and cried and found someone to talk to to help begin to console me, it helped for only a little while then to go back in the ER section he still didnt know me it wasnt until b4 we were leaving that he came around that he knew me for 4 hours this went on.

To find out days later when he was in the ward for evaluation. That he got so depressed that he couldnt pay money back he had got on loan from someone and couldnt afford christmas gifts.

Please please I urge everyone to be a light this season. People battle things that we don’t know about. Let them know you care. Listen to them! Help them by lightening the burden if you can. Don’t let depression keep taking lives or stealing joy!

Depression is so very real and is painful.

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Now that I have asked, now prepare!

We are to prepare for what we pray for!

In my time as it has been if singlehood it has provided me time to pray and seek the Lord and its a great time to spend with my Savior. Developing that true and lasting relationship with communication and worshipping his majesty, thanking him for his goodness, grace and mercy in thanksgiving. To study and delve into his guide book for all things concerning life to navigate the path here on the earth.

In times past though I hated continuing to remain single. It was as if my mind decided to name it a plague or something. But when God got hold of me through my wonderful Pastor Juanita Gibbs to show me in reality it is a blessing and a prepatory time was revolutuonary for me. It held begin to reshape my thinking on the whole thing.

Later, as time has gone on she has helped me tackle some wring stronhild thinking that I have had about it and to begin to bring healing to places from damage in my soul from my past, how I have lived this life that seriously needed attention as I had tried for so long to put a man in those places and always ended up hurt and the more empty due to the contents of my soul.

Her book up above(which can be purchased on Amazon) has helped me have a paradigm shift to loose fear, doubt and worry and begin to have faith, hope and trust in God that in time He provides whats needed. Where I had thought it may just bot happen for me and that thought is not in line with the word of God. So it is to he captured when comes and cast down (2 Corin 10:4-5).

Freedom from old stuff is a process and it takes time. As to why the word of God is the best guide book to have in this life as it touches all subjects including relationships. Her book has helped me begin to shift my mind and see myself as a winner in the faith and trust in God and His timing.

These books below are others that I have read in time past before going to the church that has so wonderfully aided me in my life far more than theae books as my lraders know me and my battles and issues as they have taught the best knowledge is your own personal experiance and gaining wisdom from those who know you personally to help naviagte the journey.

In no particular order:

This book is great for understand yourself and how you commincate in showing/displaying love to those in your life.

This book mainly focuses on enjoying single life! I passed my copy on to encourage other single sisters, but God replaced the copy when He sent me a leader in my Pastor who tells me the same thing. Enjoy, live, focus on God, walk in my purpose and his will. She is my book of wisdom since the others fully cannot relate to me as she can relate me to my story and prepare me.

This book was pretty much a reinforcement to my Pastors councel to trust God. As this spoke about divine timing and God doing the work to bring about His will and plans for my life.

This book expounded on Ruths story. She focused on her purpose with Noami and Boaz found her. Our bishop has spoke on her story in times to wait to be found by him as we are about our Fathers business. To stop falling for the words of a Bozo (lol) but wait while God works. Wait patiently with good attitude.

This book also reinforced the concept of time and touched on boundaries and enlightened that if you have things going on in your life you may not need to be in a relationship where we need wait and get healing first just as my Pastor focuses on with us. Heal the inner and if its Gods will He will bring things to pass.

This one is a premartial counceling book. That focuses on reflecting marriage as marriage of christ and the church as to which that is what earthly union should reflect when 2 born again believers come together.

This book opened up more the concept from the prior book, but showed more the difficulty and challenges in union on one flesh. As my pastor has taught us that 2 becoming one is an undertaking of understanding, forgiveness, and unconditional love to not quit when things get hard, but to keep at it.

This one I have not read, but I have read the book Boundaries just not this targeted area. But my Pastor has been instilling in me boundaries are very important in all kinds of relationships.

I so love my church Reformation Developmental Center where they speak on practical wisdom tips as well as full depth of the word of God to bring us insight into all things in this life.

~Love Life~Live Life~😍

~Cynthia πŸ˜‰

October Is Here!!!

Fall weather, falling leaves, colors changing, crisp chill in the air for a jacket and the scents of the season…

The end of September the beginnings of October insight the wonderous scenses of baked goods, warming beverages, candles, blankets, fluffy socks, etc.

I have already made one pumpkin bread this season and I even attempted a sweet potatoe bread that well didn’t turn out like I had hoped. Needless to say I will try that one again. I have plans for fruit crisps in the slow cooker to make that I brgan making last year its going to be yummy and make my home smell like baked goods.

I found some candles I had gotten on an after christmas clearance sale last year and have started lighting them on the regular adds a lil warmth to the atmosphere as well as the scents they are.

This time of year also brings about the changes to the weather, well finally…lol it was still warm when Fall first came in last few days ot has finally begun to feel like fall. I had a jacket on while out yesterday to keep warm.

Even how the sky and nights changw to bring about amazing photos that I love to take. Being able to take such amazing photos for my blogs. It even insighted the possible investment into a high quality camera to take pics with and do what I love. But, that is all a vision for an appointed time.

Fall is a favorite time of year for me for many reasons, but these here are like the top ones.

~Love Life ~ Live Life ~ 😍

~Cynthia πŸ˜‰